I fear I’m afraid.

“What would you do if you weren’t held back by fear?” (Said someone famous one time I think)

Fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of looking foolish… whatever these fears may be they hold us back more than we realize, in little ways or great.

I may not want to go base jumping… I mean, I like adventure but I’m not exactly an adrenaline junky. Still I have never considered myself a fearful person.

But maybe I am.

Via: quicklol.com
Via: quicklol.com

– – – – – – – – – –

Now it’s not like I’ve never done scary things before. It’s not as if I’ve never made big bold moves or put myself outside my comfort zone before. I have. Many times. Sometimes it’s gone well, sometimes crashed-and-burned but I’ve come out of all of these experiences a better person, if only for knowing myself better.

I’m not going to list the scary things I’ve done in the past to make a point to this post or to myself.  (Though you better believe I’m mentally running through one as I write this.)

It’s not about numbers or a track record. No, I think it’s more about my current feeling that I am allowing small fears to hold me back in little, inconsequential ways.

Or maybe not inconsequential.

Little things can add up to become mountains, afterall.

Via: lolhome.com
Via: lolhome.com

– – – – – – – – – –

I have an old postcard on my wall from high school that declares “Do Something Every Day That Scares You.” (via Eleanor Roosevelt, I believe)

While not believing in having mantras or life mottos or anything like that, I have kept this quote around for a reason. As an aspiration, if nothing else. As a reflection of the kind of person I see myself as, irregardless of factual evidence.

I believe I’ve been more on a (subconscious) “Do Something Once A Month That Scares You” plan for quite a while. And honestly, I think every single day is a bit overwhelming… I mean, you need to have a mellow, non-scary day every here or there, right?

But little fears, tiny hold-backs and procrastinations have been creeping into my life when I haven’t been looking. It’s easy to have happen. These hesitations are simple to justify and rationalize, especially with the weapon of “needing to be a mature adult in your arsenal. Or my personal favorite go-to of “everything will work out as it should” at the ready.

Being passive is just as much of a manifestation of fear as anything else.

And I don’t want to be a fearful person. That’s not what that quote on the wall depicts me as.

I don’t want to make a liar of my decor, now do I?

– – – – – – – – – –

How do you (or I) conquer these tiny little fears?  Frankly, I have no idea. I’m not a genius or therapist or expert… I’m just a random chick writing my thoughts and feelings.

Try, I guess?

Just keep trying?

(Just keep swimming, just keep swimming….)

That’s all I got.

If you have any brilliant solutions, dear blogosphere, I would LOVE to hear them.

Via: themetapicture.com
Via: themetapicture.com

SIDE NOTE: I would not mind having tea with the above monster. I find him rather adorable.

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