Spring Cleaning My Love Life

Hey, guys, remember how I just got back into online dating?

Well I am already over it. Again. After what feels like a couple million “hey sexy” messages and one “meh” first date, I am over it.  That took less than 30 days. Fastest time yet for me to get disgusted with the selection of potential suitors on any online dating resource.

But the point is, it is Spring!  Hooray!

Seems like a good time to open the windows and declutter my online and otherwise dating life.

** I should warn you all, I am super channeling my inner Disney Princess today and full of sunshine and rainbows and singing birds who want to help do my hair. It’s going to get seriously chipper and optimistic below, so hold on to your hats. **

So I have made a bit of a list. For me, for you, for anyone dating, not dating, and for general entertainment purposes:

7 Ways to Spring Clean Your Love Life – 


1. CLEAR CLUTTER … From The Internet 

Via: shainafilstudies.blogspot.com
Via: shainafilstudies.blogspot.com

– For me, this involves tracking down the random online dating sites that I signed up for at some point, promptly forgot about or got bored with, and never made the effort to actually take down. So get online, find those old log-ins, delete all your photos and information first, THEN delete your entire profile.

– For others this could be eliminating the apps or sites that you keep even though you never find anyone interesting on it (and lets be honest, you are probably on Tindr mostly as a hilarious party game for you and your girls on a Friday night)  Clear this clutter from your world so you can focus on the ways you ARE meeting quality people. Simplify.

– Oh and of course, maybe update some of those pictures and rewrite your profile to remove all meaningless cliches while you are at it, huh?

2. TOSS OUT RUBBAGE … From Your Phone

Via: fanpop.com
Via: fanpop.com

– I have waaaaaaaaay too many people in my phone with the last name “Match” or “Eharmony” or “OKC”. I probably went on one mediocre date with them months and months ago. I am going to go through my phone and delete all those numbers.

– For others this also should include any toxic exs that perhaps you tend to text after one too many glasses of malbec. Spring is about things being reborn and all fresh and new and bright and happy! Not negative baggage. Just go ahead and hit “delete contact”.

3. REORGANIZE … Your Priorities and Expectations

Via: diszine.com
Via: diszine.com

– I wrote about this earlier this week, but recognize that many of your potential “deal breakers” may be surface, unimportant things. Love may come in unexpected forms and without a 6′-4″ model physique and PHD.

– Admit that you are fallible and human and can be superficial. Then make yourself a new list of qualities you need in a partner and make sure that core attributes are at the top.

4. POLISH UP … Your Tarnished Heart


– This means boxing up and getting rid of any lingering regrets, thoughts, feelings, wants, unrealistic expectations, etc from the relationships of your past. Polish any tarnish off that ole’ heart of yours and let it shine. And if you are dating someone you are ambivalent about, ditch them. Seriously. You deserve brilliance, not mediocre.

– When your heart is nice and clean and tidy, all of a sudden you may find you have room for someone new. And just maybe the right someone.

5. DUST OFF … The Winter Lazies

Via: fanpop.com
Via: fanpop.com

– Even if you have been in full jock mode and are a gym rock star all winter, there is something invigorating about the spring and the ability to get active outside. So do it! Get off your Netflix-binge-watching butt and go for a hike. Take a run, or a bike ride, or just a great stroll with a friend. Take in some fresh air and beautiful scenery.

– A tiny bit of sunshine and physical will certainly not make you less attractive to potential mates either, guys.

6. VACUUM UP … Negativity

Via: blogs.disney.com
Via: blogs.disney.com

– Just like purging your phone (and your FB if needed), remove any sources of negativity from your life. You know the type… whether exs or friends or family, some people just tend to be debbie-downers always looking for the flaw in your budding romances.

– Decide to only talk about your relationship status (the good and the bad) with positive and supportive people. It doesn’t mean you will always agree, but limit romantic discussions to those who truly want your happiness. Don’t get sucked into a negative spiral with people who bring you down when the sun is shining.

7. OPEN THE WINDOWS … to Possibilities

Via: fanpop.com
Via: fanpop.com

– And doors and walls and whatever. Be open minded and brave.

– Then stop cleaning and get out of the house, silly!

There’s a whole world reemerging out there from the cold, waiting for you to explore it.

Via: xeternalflamebryx.deviantart.com
Via: xeternalflamebryx.deviantart.com

*** And don’t worry… I am sure this Disney-Princess-High will wear off soon enough and you will get the sardonic me back. But for now, prepare to be assaulted by pictures of adorable baby animals. Muh-hahahahahhahahahahaha! ***

2 thoughts on “Spring Cleaning My Love Life

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