So…why do you want to be my friend?

Facebook is a strange, strange world. 

We apply the term friend so very broadly nowadays… I know I am friends in the Facebook world with everyone ranging from co-workers, to former professors, to childhood friends and even distant relatives. It’s an odd conglomeration of my world and I will admit that I certainly have FB friends that I am not super close to or rarely see.

I also credit FB with helping me reconnect with people who are now friends IRL, so there are both sides.

I won’t FB friend someone I don’t know, or someone I fundamentally don’t like.

Simple, personal rules.

However, there are certain type of Facebook Friend Requests that I simply don’t understand, either because I don’t know how you found me or why the heck you want access to the FB version of my life. They make no sense to me.

All six of these occurrences have happened to me, and I am still fairly perplexed:

1. The Complete Stranger:  We have no friends in common, don’t live in the same city, aren’t from the same city, don’t share a profession and are often in drastically different age groups. We quite seriously have zero overlaps in life and have never met. No, I will not let you into my artfully-crafted FB world. Sorry.


2. Strange Name, No Profile Pic:  Um, I don’t think that combination of letters is a real name and you have no face. Yeah, we may have x-number of friends in common but your pseudonym/incognito vibe doesn’t help me have ANY idea who the heck you are. Request deigned.


3. The Oops! Request:  You sent me a friend request. I know this because my magical phone tells me these things. Online only 20-minutes later, you have revoked your friend request.  I am confused. I am assuming the initial request was a mistake, but it still hurts, dammit. Once you have sent the request, it’s supposed to be MY chance to reject you. You never even gave me that option. So cruel. 


4. First Date Dude: Okay, so maybe we have been on one date or just chatted. Either way, this request comes WAY too early on in our interaction. I am friends with my family… you are not allowed to see childhood pics quite yet, mister.  I don’t even know if I like you that much yet, so let’s hold off FB, huh?


5. Childhood Acquaintance’s Dad: So you cross paths at a wedding, then this FB request comes. He hasn’t seen you since you were 11. You were never particularly close. Suddenly he wants to see all your grown-up vaycay photos? Umm, no and why?


6. The Hot Guy From HS: (Just happened, and the inspiration for this post, in fact) The last time you saw me, I was 15. You were the really hot senior when I was the new, awkward freshman. We maybe interacted twice. I thought you were dreamy. I also assumed you didn’t know my name. Now, 15 years later, you randomly want to see how awesome I have become. (Hint: Pretty Darn Awesome.)


CONFESSION: HS Guy, you are still pretty, so I juuuuuuuuuuuuuust might have accepted your request.  

What? My 15-year-old self certainly would have!


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