Dance, Party of One

It’s been a while, but this past Saturday night I ended up at a club, dancing my little butt off.

(I should also note that any of the dancing I am referring too is your typical hip-shaking, shoulder-shimmying club type of dancing. Not to be confused with something choreographed, coordinated, or requiring any actual skills.)

Honestly, I had forgotten what an absolute pure joy and pleasure just “gettin’ down with your bad self” in a club can be. I very, VERY quickly remembered why I spent many a weekend hitting up joints in the L.E.S. while I was a New Yorker.

When you go into the right setting, with the right mentality, hardly anything is better than dancing the night away.


Now on this particular Saturday night, I ended up meeting up with a handful of friends at a gay club primarily frequented by men. Which was perfection to me since I fundamentally prefer to dance alone.

Why? Well, I am glad you asked, faceless internet. I have prepared a list.

The Three Reasons I Prefer Dancing Alone: 


I believe every lady who reads this can relate… You are out, just dancing to the rhythm and some random person thinks that your existence is, in fact, an open invitation to invade your personal space. Believe it or not, my soul purpose of going out dancing was not to have a stranger touch me. Shocking, I know.

I am sorry. But I don’t know you. I don’t recall giving you permission to put your hands, or hips, or WHATEVER on or near my body. Just don’t. Don’t touch me.


Dancing alone, you can really feel free to experiment and play with the rhythm and the flow of your body’s movement. You want to move slowly catching the off-beats? Go for it. You want to jump around then attempt some MJ worthy footwork? Totally acceptable, even back to back. You can let the music guide you, the beat and vocals directing your body.

And with no partner, there is no one to throw off.

Added bonus: if you do something which looks really really silly it is unlikely that anyone noticed and you can just giggle quietly to yourself and promise to never, ever try that again. (Some people were just not meant to twerk.)


If you allow yourself to really be in the moment, and let any self-criticisms and judgements go, there is nothing more liberating and satisfying as being in the now.

Just you and no one else, content and happy in music and movement and the moment.


I really do prefer to dance alone. But I know that is not for everyone. Some of you may actually have counterparts who not only have Moves Like Jagger, but genuinely enjoy putting them out there. I applaud your luck and hope for your happiness. I am certainly not trying to instill my solo-dancing-preferences as the end all be all of club dancing.

I am not the world’s greatest dancer. But at the end of the day, solo, partnered, in a pack, whatever, I still think dancing is the bee’s knees. So I present to you, YET ANOTHER LIST!

Three Reasons Why Dancing is Fun for All:

1. FUN, DUH: Dancing is FUN, guys! It is one of the most pure, natural forms of artistic expression. It can be silly, sexy, dynamic, playful, odd, ridiculous, whatever. Doesn’t matter. It is, and should be, a source of pleasure. Don’t take it too seriously and your happiness will know no bounds. Money back, guaranteed.

2. CARDIO: If you are just constantly in motion, in whatever Elaine-From-Seinfeld-Esque moves you possess, you are going to work up a sweat. If you don’t get tired and maybe a little sore from dancing, I say you are doing it wrong. It’s an enjoyable way to burn some calories without thinking about it. Seriously, just do the darn thing.

3. DANCE-DRUNK: I don’t mean that you need to be drunk to dance. I mean embrace the fantastic high of really getting into music. I am either blessed or cursed with the fact I have almost zero self-awareness and give even less cares for how ridiculous I look when dancing. I can get buzzed on a great bass line or intoxicated from a catchy chorus.

Now if a drink or three is what it takes for you to shake your tail-feathers, that’s completely acceptable as well. Just be prepared for the addition of endorphins to up your happiness.



It was in college and I was out dancing with a group of buddies. At one point one of my guy friends mentioned that he felt like he should be paying me when seeing me dance. At the time, it was SUPER traumatizing and a crushing blow to my ego. I took this as meaning I danced like a hussy and should never dance in public again.

However, over time, I have deduced a different definition to this casual statement. I take it as meaning I have confidence. I have actual rhythm, coordination and a bit of creativity. I take it as saying I look comfortable on a dance floor. That I appear happy and content in my own body and being.

Now that is not a bad way to be at all.

I don’t agree with that old cliche of “dance as if no one is watching.”  I say dance as if EVERYONE is watching and they think you are AMAZING.

I say be free. Ignore others. Solo or however, dance in a way that makes you happy. Let the rhythm move you, let the music take you, and leave it all on the dance floor.

I will let Mr. Billy Idol take this one home….

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